Another week of starting off with cheat days and then trying to recover again and…again…I’m back on the right track. I screwed up Wed-Sat of last week and then got back on track on Sunday and been killing it the last few days.
I started getting up at 5:30am to do cardio/boxing and it’s not been easy but I really feel like it wakes me up and sets me up for success during the day and even though it’s early as fuck and the Sharketo Dojo is basically just my basement and EXTREMELY COLD- I do enjoy it. It’s a nice way to start the day. I’m walking my breaks/lunch and then doing weights at 4pm. I’m doing a 20/4 IF schedule but I’m really trying for 23/1 IF- just depends on how you look at it. I take my MCT/Pre-Workout at 3pm so that “technically” breaks my fast because the MCT has 130 calories but you don’t actually “eat” that and it’s a part of my pre-workout routine- I’m still trying to just eat one meal a day.
On top of starting that schedule back up, I’m working on changing my food- less processed deli meats, etc and more greens like kale and spinach. I want to try to have a huge salad every night with dinner and I even made my own apple cider vinegar/Dijon mustard dressing which has less than .5g of carbs per serving with a ton of healthy fats. I’m using that instead of Ranch. I’m trying to limit the cheese as well and really focus on 299 lbs before I turn 41 years old on March 3rd. I gained a ton of water weight again- from the cheat days- but dropped over 4 lbs just last night thanks to getting back on it.
I think I’ll be back down to around 304 lbs by Feb 17th- if not sooner and then have 2 weeks to drop 5 lbs of actual weight.
Something clicks in me and I don’t understand- I don’t want to call it “depression” because that word is way over used in our society. I just have bad days where I think about life too much- I’m easily annoyed, not my normal happy self and I always turn to food during those times. Then- something switches and I get hit with motivation and I’m back to my happy amazing self…instantly overnight- nothing really changes.
I named 2019 – “Missing Link” because that is exactly what it is- in 2018, I learned how to eat and exercise and lose weight (136 lbs.) but now I need to focus on connecting that to a lifelong routine and success. I need to figure out the reason I instantly turn to bad food when I have those “off” days- even when Sharketo food tastes better! It doesn’t make sense but that is where I am right now…I need to find a way to link 2018 to 2020 in order to make what I learned a daily routine- to maintain my current weight loss, to lose more and to understand why I turn to food and to be able to fight that addiction and my successful for the rest of my life. I know there will be ups and downs…cheat days and perfect days but I need to figure out a way to even all of that out.
I need to find that Missing Link and 2019 is going to be WAY harder than 2018 was because I’m looking into reasons why I do stupid shit and trying to figure out the mental aspect and that is way harder than just eating right and exercising.
Today starts a “new” week for me and I’m not going to let it start the way the last two have. I’m stringing together several perfect days into perfect weeks…into 299 lbs.
Love, Peace and Sharkyness