I am going to try to break this down- this is the perfect example of why losing weight is so hard and frustrating and why very few people are successful and even those that are end up screwing it all back up.
Monday – Thursday – 20 hrs fasting, 4 hrs eating (2 hrs per day workout)
Friday – I ate a couple times through Friday – roughly 4 hrs eating (2 hrs walking)
Saturday – 20 hrs fasting, 4 hrs eating (cheat)
Sunday – 18 hrs not eating, 6 hrs eating (cheat)
138 – Fasting (or just not eating)
20 – Hours of eating healthy
10 – Hours of cheating
10 – Hours of exercise
168 hours in a week (the hours don’t work out because those 10 hours of exercise were also in the fasting/not eating)
There is the break down from last week.
I started Monday morning at 321.8 lbs.
I lost 12 lbs during the week.
I gained 12 lbs during the 10 hours of cheating.
I broke even basically.
Now, those 10 hours of “cheating” wasn’t just me eating as much as I could during the entire 10 hours, it was just a rough time frame of when I had bad food. I went almost all of Saturday and basically had a cheat meal on Saturday and Sunday with cookies and some cake.
Saturday I had some pretzel pizza (4 pieces), some candy and cookies. Sunday I had a 3 pieces of fried chicken with small sides of mashed potatoes, cole slaw and 1.5 biscuits with some cake and cookies. Way too much but not 42,000 calories needed to gained 12 lbs- not even close.
I don’t know how many calories or carbs I had but I do know that, for a small fraction of the total week, I ate stuff I shouldn’t have and that completely canceled out getting up at 5:30am, eating perfectly and doing an hour of cardio/boxing/walking and weights.
Remember- my lowest this year as 304.8 lbs but I continue to just go up and down each week and every week is basically the same.
No one can say I don’t bust my ass- I do a ton of exercise and eat perfectly about 5 days a week and on most of the weekends until I finally give in and screw up for a few hours and those few hours eliminate the rest.
Roughly 10 hours of a cheat window undoes 158 hours of fasting, exercise and eating healthy.
This is why so many people are overweight and unhealthy right now and why it’s so hard to be successful at this. I lost 136 lbs over a year and I’m still struggling every damn day.
The only way to be successful is to focus on those 10 hours of cheating…that small window when I just give up and honestly don’t give a fuck about anything but carbs- pizza, cookies, cakes…etc.
It’s the same as working two jobs all week- getting that paycheck and then spending it all on ONE lottery ticket. It takes a few minutes of your life to scratch it- you lost again- back to your two jobs on Monday morning to do it all over again. You don’t get your bills paid, you don’t enjoy your money, you don’t see any “good” from all that working….you ONLY get those few minutes of enjoyment and then the cycle repeats.
On top of all of that- you know the EXACT problem yet continue to do it over and over again. If that isn’t addiction, then you tell me what is.
This is what most people don’t tell/show you about weight loss- it’s not all before and after pictures or Face to Face Friday bullshit- it’s daily struggle. Weekly failure and total frustration.
You can’t just quit. You can’t just be done with food and never touch the stuff again…you just have to face it every fucking day of your fucking life.
Today isn’t day one because I’ve still come a long way but it’s yet another day of starting over. Working my ass off all week and doing exactly what I should only to face down those 10 hours again this weekend- I’m not sure the 158 hours of focused hard work is worth those 10 hours any longer.
You reach a point where you just say- fuck it. I lose. Food wins. Battle over and let’s enjoy the slow death and who knows- if I try my hardest, maybe I will get to meet Dr. Now.
I say that as I face another Monday with plans of walking, fasting and hitting the Sharketo Dojo for the next 5 days to prepare for a weekend battle that I don’t have much chance of winning. I honestly want to give up at this point because I’m just tired of doing this same bullshit and it’s not on anyone or anything else- it’s 100% on me.
No, I’m not giving up…I am getting back up and trying again but it’s getting harder and harder to do and I’m tired of doing it every single week of my life.
Love, Peace and Sharkyness