It all depends on the person and what they did- I have found that I don’t really take a lot of stuff personal any longer. At this point in life, there is one person that I would never forgive and that would be my “dad”. He left when I was really young and never really had anything to do with me and didn’t give a shit.
When I moved in with my wife, it just happened to be in the same city as him and really pretty close- we passed his house often. When we realized Jackie was pregnant, I stepped up as a man and father and wrote him a letter with my phone number, I wanted my son to have an actual grandfather- something I never had.
He actually called and we got together a few times and even spent a Christmas together but him and his wife had in their head that we would just leave Evan with him- to babysit and stuff- as soon as he was born.
LOL. We didn’t even let close friends keep Evan- he was our first and he was our responsibility and I wasn’t even close to comfortable enough with this stranger keeping our son. He may have donated the sperm to create me but he was every bit a stranger. Quickly after that, he stopped calling, stopped picking up and that was the end of it. I had stepped up and put in the effort and it was time for him to put in some effort and make up for past mistakes and be a grandfather and, just like with being a dad, he wasn’t man enough to do that.
I forgave him for doing it to me- there is no forgiveness for doing it to my son; that forgiveness doesn’t exist.
Other than that- I’ve forgiven people and hopefully people have forgiven me.
There is also a specific bully from middle school that I’ve never forgave because he made my life a living hell but I can’t say I wouldn’t forgive him if he apologized- kids are assholes and that is the truth and we grow and we learn and we change. The problem is – I doubt he even remembers me- I’m just a speck of his childhood that doesn’t affect him yet the bullying molded me into who I am today and still has an effect on my life.
Love, Peace and Sharkyness