Aug 23, 2017 - Personal Journey, Thoughts    No Comments

One Day

Since screwing up on Keto, I’ve had one goal before trying to get back on the wagon and I’ve come close to that goal a few times but never achieved it- having ONE Iced Mocha from McDonald’s without anything being screwed up and it almost….ALMOST happened today!

I was so close, I could taste it….I could feel my destiny and then it was ripped from my hands.

This adventure has included getting an ice coffee with chocolate syrup, getting something that tasted like water with chocolate syrup, getting an Iced Mocha without the whipped cream/chocolate drizzle and having a guy trying to take our order and not having a clue what I was even talking about….but today felt different.

I had awoke early and had some extra time so I figured…why not? It rarely occurs to me that I can just stop and get stuff on my way to work and it’s always awesome when I realize that. I pulled into the Lawrenceburg McDonalds (the one on Commerce Way…our “usual”) with my expectations being pretty low- I was hoping to at least come away with a drink that included coffee in it. I ordered ONE Iced Mocha and the girl automatically entered an ice coffee…BUT….she caught herself instantly and corrected it- even asked me what type of milk I wanted, which blew my mind….I started wondering…I mean…could this be….nah, it couldn’t….but just maybe….JUST MAYBE…my adventure would come to an end. I knew I was way too optimistic- there were only a few feet between me and my Iced Mocha but those feet could have been miles.

I pulled up to the window and paid with my credit card- the girl asked if I wanted a receipt and seemed highly aggravated when I said yes…but that was OK….an employee being aggravated at wanting a receipt wasn’t a “screw up” and she had already instantly caught her mistake earlier…so my journey was still on course…I was still set to change my entire world!

I pulled to the next window and looked in at an older lady finishing up MY ICED MOCHA….oh my god, was it beautiful…it was perfection. It was just setting there, ready to go….brownish coffee with the dark chocolate syrup swirled around with a huge puff of whipped cream and MY GOD…the chocolate drizzle was perfect and that dome lit that helps shield your fingers completed it…ladies and gentlemen…this was it! My destiny- after so many failed attempts at perfection, August 23rd, 2017 would go down in history!

I looked away to put my credit card back in my wallet and get everything situated – I turned the air conditioner down, I had the stereo at the perfect listening level…my wallet and phone were put a way and then it happened….I was startled at first….the older lady was at the window with my drink but what had happened?????????

Where was my perfect drink???

I looked at her with obvious surprise- she could see it in my eyes….as if she had killed my only beloved son and I was staring at her with shock, anger and a ton of other emotions…

….this drink looked right but she had removed that glorious domed lid and replaced it with a flat lid, she had smashed the whipped cream and chocolate drizzle down as far as she could…for no reason…it had been perfect…and then I heard what she was saying…

“the Iced Moca doesn’t come with whipped cream or chocolate…so it’s your lucky day.”

I sat there for a few moments….contemplating life and death, thinking of ways to end my life right there…in front of this women- she deserved to see my death, she was the one responsible for it, after all.

I didn’t know what to say or do….even if she was right (which she wasn’t), why wouldn’t you have just left the dome lid on it instead of making a huge mess by smashing it down with a flat lit.

As I drove off, I put the straw in the lid and it instantly erupted, like a volcano of white lava- spewing out of the top of my straw all over me….like my hopes and dreams.

The irony of all of this is that we watched “The Founder” just the other night, it’s basically the story of McDonald’s and how they didn’t want it to become a shitty restaurant like all the others….like it has become today.

Iced Mocha seems like such a simple concept and maybe, JUST MAYBE…one day I’ll have it…but until then, my journey continues…certainly full of future heart ache and sorrow.

So…to my readers…don’t be like me- use me as an example to never put your hopes into a McDonalds…because they are all just so damn terrible.

And just as proof to show that I’m write, here is a screen shot from the actual McDonald’s page….whipped cream, chocolate drizzle and a DOMED lid….if only everything on the internet was reality…if only jpeg’s we found showed real life…how amazing would that be….what a wonderful world it would be….

Love, Peace and Sharkyness
~~~~~shArky~~~~~

I’m Back

I think it may be time to finally get back….our house is coming along nicely! Everything is basically done and we just have a few more boxes to unpack, then clean and we should be able to get back to a regular schedule by the weekend.

Today was our son’s first day of middle school and he is super chunky- like his mom and dad- and I know my middle school days were fucking hell…..beyond miserable because kids are assholes and we really need to make a change now.

We were doing great on keto…I’m still down about 50 lbs. so we need to refocus and get back to it…we took about 1.5 months off to get the house bought, moved, painted…do the kitchen floor, work on the basement but that is all done and it’s now time.

I don’t really want to die before I can actually enjoy the house that we literally just put blood, sweat and tears into!

Tonight, we are going out to celebrate our sons first day and having a final “carb loaded” meal and then getting back on it tomorrow…doesn’t matter that it’s a Thursday or that it’s the 10th….we can no longer keep putting shit off until Monday or the first…etc.

It’s going to be hard and it’s going to be a nightmare trying to get our son off of snacks and shitty food but we are going to have to battle through it so he can be successful.

There are going to be bad days, cheat days and days that we just fall off the wagon but there can’t be any more of this multiple day bullshit.

The Sharketo Dojo is ready and waiting….I’ve got another 150 lbs. to lose and I need to do it NOW.

Look for more recipes (we now have a fucking amazing kitchen!) and be ready for more updates!!!

ALSO…..Burning Shadows just came out and my son and I have already opened a booster box and several 3 pack blisters and the pulls have been pretty damn amazing!

Gotta get back to what is important in life….Pokemon and health.

Love, Peace and Sharkness
~~~~shArky~~~~

Jul 13, 2017 - Thoughts    No Comments

Life or Death

Life hit me with a couple of things today and I wanted to share.



First – I’ve become the dinosaur, the old man, the veteran, the lifer or whatever you want to call it. I’ve been working at the same place for 12 years now, same actual job for about 10 years and I see these new folks coming in and it amazes me that I was ever like they are. I remember my first day here, I wore a tie and I had one co-worker make fun of me all day because it was NOT that type of place. (That co-worker still works here but he is in rough shape but still kicking.)

Every day is basically the same- where I park, the path I walk in, the elevator I take. I come in, walk down a huge hall and pass a ton of cubes until I get to mine, pick up my water jug and head to the break room. I put my lunch in the fridge, fill up on water and head back to my cube where I plug my phone in, plug my Bluetooth headphones in and start checking email.

I answer emails, run reports and fix issues until my headphones charge up, then I get on YouTube and get “philled” in by Philip Defranco, hope that Boogie 2988 has something new for me, listen to some stuff about keto recipes, check OmniPoke for the best Pokemon content on the internet and then just listen to random videos as I do what has become 2nd nature to me. I enter data and run reports pretty much all day- fix issues, answer questions, set stuff up but I just do what needs to be done.

I don’t know if that is good or bad- a part of me really enjoys knowing how my work day is going to go- knowing what I do and how to do it makes my day a lot easier because I hate doing stuff that I don’t understand and I understand what I do pretty well but another part realizes that I’m just counting the days until I get ass cancer.

The second thing I thought about today is perspective.

Once the day gets started, I set in my cube and when I look up I see a wall of windows- depending on the day, I could see a bright blue sky with huge fluffy clouds and the green of thousands of trees…for miles! I’m on the 3rd floor and the view is pretty amazing. I could see gray skies with pouring down rain or I could literally set and watch a storm roll in- I can literally watch it come in, be over us and leave because being so high up lets me see for a crazy distance…I’m probably seeing the tops of trees in other counties….I bet I could see Russia from my cube! (I mean, Washington DC is that far from KY…right?)

There is nothing cooler than getting a really strong storm while I’m at work- it’s honestly amazing and breathtaking.

You can really tell the difference in the seasons when you can see so much- fall is amazing, snow storms are incredible and I love when Bill Meck tells me there is a massive storm coming because the view will be like a live painting.

That is the view I focus on because that is what I enjoy and my life is pretty amazing right now.

But there is something else that I see daily, right in the same view….sort of hidden in the trees and it’s the Office of the State Medical Examiner. There website says they “assist KY coroners and law enforcement agencies in all aspects of death investigations…perform forensic autopsy to aid in the determination of cause and manner of death.”

Death is right in the middle of my amazing view.

While I’m setting there, enjoying the view and how amazing nature is, I’m also staring at a building full of dead people who have been or are about to be cut open.

Could you imagine the effects of that on someone who was depressed or hated life…to know that you are basically staring at death for a large part of your day- 5 days a week?

So- in closing…I’m almost 40 and clearly on the “downside” of life and past the half way mark on the road to retirement and I get to set and stare at the death building all day….yet I’m still pretty damn happy and love life.

Life is what you make it….you can be amazed by life or focus on death….it’s really up to you.

Love, Peace and Sharkyenss
~~~~~shArky~~~~~

A New Hope

My last update was 9 days ago and it’s time to get things back on track….honestly, I’ve had a decent reason though.

Yesterday, my wife and I signed the final papers and are now “homeowners” and I say that with quotes because we are basically just renting to own a house because the mortgage company is the actual owners but that is how life works; you can’t make it unless you are in debt.

Honestly, we’ve spent the last two weeks “celebrating”- no one explains to you that the house buying process is INSANE and no amount of “approvals” matter until you actually have a deed in your name. We got our first approval- so we took a day off from Sharketo to celebrate…then we got another approval and another AND ANOTHER!!! With every approval came a carb filled celebration because we thought the house was ours…only to be told there were more approvals to come…..and with those, more celebrations.

That is all done. No more approvals, no more celebrations….time to get back on track with burgers, cheese, bacon, etc and I’ve got my delicious salad of baby spinach, bacon, cheese and ranch for lunch- then hitting up my coffee when I get home and some delicious dinner and almost NO CARBS!

We can’t actually start working on our new house until Sunday but every day this month will be loaded with fixing cracks, sanding, panting, cleaning, moving and just non-stop moving- so the calories are going to get burned…if we can just stick to the MACROS, then we will be back in ketosis in no time and right back where we were! Even though we went over bored with celebrations…we didn’t do a crazy amount of damage so we should be fine.

The real exercise starts in August- once we have everything moved and the Sharketo Dojo set up and ready to go- it’s going to be amazing!

If you follow me on Facebook, you know I’ve talked about buying the house a lot and that is because it’s a huge step for someone like me- I grew up in the projects on welfare and food stamps; my mom busted her ass and got us into a house when I got into high school but it was through Section 8. Once I graduated, I moved back into the projects and then met the girl that became my wife. We lived in a small apartment, then we moved up to a duplex and then to a house….but we were always renters- owning a home didn’t seem possible to me and it still doesn’t really. I try to make my son understand the importance of this step but he only remembers living in a 3 bedroom brick home…so he doesn’t have a clue- and I guess that is a good thing.

He hasn’t gone through anything like I had to go through and I’m proud of that…that is the actual job of a parent- make sure they don’t die and make their childhood better than yours.

I have a very busy month ahead of me and my goal is NO MORE days off for the rest of the year- Sharketo 24/7! This is a huge step and I need to get this weight off in order to be around long enough to enjoy it!

Starting in August- we should be bringing you more reviews, recipes and several weekly updates so keep checking in!

Love, Peace and Sharkyness!
~~~~~shArky~~~~~

It’s A Revolution 

4 days from now, 2017 will be half over and I’m already seeing that infamous meme- “almost half way through 2017 and I lost no weight, didn’t learn anything, haven’t made an effort to save any money and still ugly”. It seems that every year I see something like that- people who make New Year’s Resolutions but just continue to live the same life and never trying to make anything better and it made me reflect on the first half of 2017 for myself and, honestly, I was pretty damn amazed!

I started off 2017 by not making New Year’s Resolution but by trying to start a Sharky Revolution.

Revolution: a forcible overthrow of a government or social order in favor of a new system.

I wanted to overthrow myself in favor of a new me and it seems to be working pretty awesome. I took January away from Facebook- I didn’t make any announcement of it, I just stopped posting and really slowed down on scrolling. I made a post on January 31st announcing that 2017 would be “The Year of The Shark”. So…at the half way point, let’s check out where I’m at-

1.      In January, I was one of only 19 individuals who got a 2016 Outstanding Employee Award, out of several hundred. There were several more “group” awards but only a handful of us actually got the plaque.

2.      In February I bought my wife Lady Gaga tickets (for a concert in NOVEMBER!!!) because she is the most amazing girl in the world.

3.      In February I announced my dedication to Pokemon…I’ve been into the cards for a few months and was really learning the game but I really go into it- I try to play every day, watch videos and learn about decks and how to get better- it’s the single greatest stress reliever I have ever found. It’s helped me stay away from news and just become a happier person.

4.      Sadly…also in February, I feel off the weight loss track after losing 15 lbs. but I did manage to maintain that 15 lbs lost under April…(more on that later)

5.      In March I started writing way more and revamped SharkysWorld.com into something I update more regularly and really pour my heart into.

6.      In late March, after reconsolidating all of my credit cards into one payment with a much lower rate, I finally upgraded from a 1999 Cavalier that was literally falling apart to a 2013 Dodge Avenger in amazing shop, good miles and has been an outstanding car.

7.      April 17th I started keto- aka Sharketo. I was still down 15 lbs. from earlier and I hit it really hard and I’ve stuck with it (for the most part) and I’m currently down 52 lbs. for the year. There has been some rough spots but it’s a way of eating that is really easy to get back into and your screw ups don’t set you back as much as with a different types of eating. I’m still pretty motivated and inspired to keep going- just need to slow down on the screw ups.

8.      On April 17th our son was Citizen of the Month for 2nd year in a row and received one of the special awards that only a small group of kids get.

9.      We spent April learning new recipes, cooking more and losing weight like crazy.

10.   In May I got my first booster box of Guardians Rising (Pokemon cards) and pulled a Secret Rare Gold Aqua Patch out of my first pack. 

11.   In May, my trading card charity – Commons4Kids donated our 7 millionth trading card! We’ve donated over 7 million cards now to kids in 13 different states and literally worked with people all over the world, in tons of different countries.

12.   Our son graduated from 5th grade in May- he graduated “with honors” as never making anything less than an A during his entire elementary school career and with being one of only three kids not missing a single day his 5thgrade year. His elementary school years were loaded with awards and accomplishments.

13.   May 26th my wife and I celebrated our 11th year of marriage (14 years together though!)

14.   May 31st, we signed a contract to make an offer on our first house!

15.   During June, our house got appraised, passed inspection and got final approval from the underwriter and we are only waiting on the title to come back and to set up the closing date AND I hit the 50 lbs. lost mark.

For me, 2017 has been NOTHING short of “The Year of The Shark” and I am very motivated to make the 2nd half of the year even better!

As for the meme from the first paragraph – “almost half way through 2017 and I lost 52 lbs., learned a ton about Pokemon while relieving stress, saved tons of money with lower interest rates while building up a credit score and reputation that has people throwing credit at us…but….still ugly”

I mean, come on guys, it’s really hard to fix ugly.

Love, Peace and Sharkyness
~~~~~shArky~~~~~

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