Sep 20, 2017 - Pokemon    No Comments

Don’t Play Your Fav


There is one major thing that folks don’t understand about Pokemon- you can have a favorite Pokemon but NOT play it in your deck.

Sometimes people luck up and have their favorite Pokemon be Darkrai or Gardevoir and they get to play with them in some of the most powerful decks ever built- they get to feel the happiness of watching their favorite Pokemon run wild in the world, destroying everything in its path…but then you have people like me…I may never get that feeling.

My favorite Pokemon is Cubone…try playing a Cubone deck and see what happens. We do have an Alolan Marowak which could lead to playing a couple Cubone’s here and there but I doubt it. My second favorite is Pikachu and even though Pikachu has an EX and is even in a few decks, it’s not great. (Right now, you basically use Marshadow to copy Pikachu’s attack!)

My third favorite is Sharpedo and it even got a MEGE EVOLUTION…but still…not good.

Those are my three favorites…of course- I am a fan of Darkrai and I do get to use that to run wild a bit but it’s not the same as knocking out a high HP, full powered Gardevoir GX with a Cubone…I mean…a man can dream, right?

The first thing I did when I started actually getting into the TCG was to hop online and use the deck wizard- I was asked to pick two Pokemon…well, duh- Cubone and Pikachu!!! The deck was randomly built and I was on my way…my record is 0-7 with that deck. It is terrible but it taught me a strong lesson- don’t play your favorite Pokemon in a deck, unless it’s a part of the meta.

I do have a couple standards that I try my best to work in…I always use my Sharpedo coin and I try to work in a full art Wicke card into most decks. It’s not a terrible card and reminds me of my wife, so you can’t go wrong there.

So….all that rambling to simply say…I’m pretty sure that hitting a floating fairy with a bone from my dead mother should probably be enough for the win… at least once! 

Love, Peace and Sharkyness

Sep 14, 2017 - Pokemon    No Comments


A now…for something completely different.

The Story of Cubone.

I’ve always known what Pokemon was- it came out when I was in high school and I always thought Pikachu was cute (he’s still one of my favs) but I never gave it much thought. Flash forward 20 years and my son is into Pokemon and we are buying cards left and right and he is trying to tell me everything there is to know so I don’t have much choice but to listen.

Then I get interested and then…BOOM…I become the legendary trainer I am today.

I started reading up on Pokemon and a story quickly jumped out at me and a special bond was formed between me and a little bipedal Pokemon.

Cubone is the child of Marowak, who dies while defending it from Team Rocket. Cubone then puts on its mother’s skull to continue to protect it during battles. Cubone sees the likeness of its mother in the moon and cries throughout the night. The stains on the skull that it wears are made from its tears.

Now, if that story wasn’t sad enough…listen to this…the FIRST Cubone I ever caught in Pokemon Go was at the Frankfort Cemetery! We were driving around, getting Pokestops and it just popped up on one of the graves.

There is a 20 year old theory in Pokemon that Cubone could also evolve into a Kangaskhan!

Kangaskhan doesn’t evolve into or from any other Pokemon, but the theory says that if a Kangaskhan passes away, the child in its pouch would use the skull of its parent to protect itself out in the wilds. Eventually this Cubone, the abandoned child, would evolve into a Marowak and then into a Kangaskhan, thus bringing things full circle!

I keep a stuffed Cubone next to my computer at all times- to help me make decisions on PTCGO…because I’m weird like that.

This is why Pokemon is so awesome….even though Cubone isn’t very powerful and there isn’t really a strong deck for him, he is barely even playable in the card game- his story is still amazing.

All of the different Pokemon, different games, different shows and different stories is what makes it more of a lifestyle than a game…its stories like that which makes it entertaining for adults as well. The entire world of Pokemon is incredible and it saddens me that I waited until my late 30’s to really get into it.

Now…go out there and be the best, like no one ever was!

Love, Peace and Sharkyness

Sep 12, 2017 - Poetry    No Comments


I’m a writer…a poet
I never knew it
Now I know it
I’m not a show-er
I’m a grower
A lyrical leaf blower
I don’t take shit
I drop rhyme
Like a crime
A wordy who done it
That wasn’t natural
It didn’t have a flow
My switch was turned off
I didn’t blow
I was sucking
Call it a typo
Like when my phone uses ducking
That’s not what I entered
I was trying to say ducking
Stupid auto correct.

Love, Peace and Sharkyness

Sep 8, 2017 - Thoughts    No Comments

Dear Christians

Let’s, for a moment, be on the same page. I, as an atheist, will put myself in your shoes and agree with your beliefs- there is a god…but not any of the other thousands of gods….only YOURS.
I keep seeing people like Kirk Cameron or random preachers yelling about how all of these hurricanes and earthquakes are god’s punishment for things like abortion, gay people or just not being humble enough and I wonder, why can’t it be the other way around?

Remember- we both now believe in Yahweh…so why can’t he be creating all of this chaos due to things like electing someone like Donald Trump to lead us? Why can’t the hurricanes be getting stronger and stronger because he is getting madder and madder that we continue to allow racism to march in the streets, disguised as “freedom of speech?” 

Here is a better idea- maybe god created hurricane Harvey to give Christians a chance to show the world their values and to be the light in such a terrible storm…but then people like Joel Osteen let him down, so he created hurricane Irma to give them a second chance? Another shot to do the right thing?

Maybe god sees the way we are closing abortion clinics and treating women like second class citizens, the way we hate each other for our difference or the way we let our government control who can/can’t love each other (and get a tax break for it).

I find it funny that we both now agree that god exists yet we each use the “wrath of god” to further our agendas- yours of control and hate and mine of love and acceptance. 

Maybe god sees that we are destroying the planet he created…we’ve realized how and why yet we continue to refuse to stop and ignore things like global warming, so he’s decided to step it up and help us destroy his creation even quicker?

That was fun…but back to reality. Claiming hurricanes are punishment from a god due to people not following YOUR agenda is beyond insane and shows how screwed up your head is- to ignore that this stuff is not only normal but continues to intensify based on climate issues is the exact reason things continue to get worse and worse…and the answer is to pray.

Pray for Texas, Pray for Florida….pray for this and pray for that and keep pushing outdated, idiotic fairy tales.

If you believe in god, maybe you are misreading his messages…but if you don’t, maybe you are just as tired of the bullshit as I am.

Love, Peace and Sharkyness

Aug 23, 2017 - Thoughts    No Comments

One Day

Since screwing up on Keto, I’ve had one goal before trying to get back on the wagon and I’ve come close to that goal a few times but never achieved it- having ONE Iced Mocha from McDonald’s without anything being screwed up and it almost….ALMOST happened today!

I was so close, I could taste it….I could feel my destiny and then it was ripped from my hands.

This adventure has included getting an ice coffee with chocolate syrup, getting something that tasted like water with chocolate syrup, getting an Iced Mocha without the whipped cream/chocolate drizzle and having a guy trying to take our order and not having a clue what I was even talking about….but today felt different.

I had awoke early and had some extra time so I figured…why not? It rarely occurs to me that I can just stop and get stuff on my way to work and it’s always awesome when I realize that. I pulled into the Lawrenceburg McDonalds (the one on Commerce Way…our “usual”) with my expectations being pretty low- I was hoping to at least come away with a drink that included coffee in it. I ordered ONE Iced Mocha and the girl automatically entered an ice coffee…BUT….she caught herself instantly and corrected it- even asked me what type of milk I wanted, which blew my mind….I started wondering…I mean…could this be….nah, it couldn’t….but just maybe….JUST MAYBE…my adventure would come to an end. I knew I was way too optimistic- there were only a few feet between me and my Iced Mocha but those feet could have been miles.

I pulled up to the window and paid with my credit card- the girl asked if I wanted a receipt and seemed highly aggravated when I said yes…but that was OK….an employee being aggravated at wanting a receipt wasn’t a “screw up” and she had already instantly caught her mistake earlier…so my journey was still on course…I was still set to change my entire world!

I pulled to the next window and looked in at an older lady finishing up MY ICED MOCHA….oh my god, was it beautiful…it was perfection. It was just setting there, ready to go….brownish coffee with the dark chocolate syrup swirled around with a huge puff of whipped cream and MY GOD…the chocolate drizzle was perfect and that dome lit that helps shield your fingers completed it…ladies and gentlemen…this was it! My destiny- after so many failed attempts at perfection, August 23rd, 2017 would go down in history!

I looked away to put my credit card back in my wallet and get everything situated – I turned the air conditioner down, I had the stereo at the perfect listening level…my wallet and phone were put a way and then it happened….I was startled at first….the older lady was at the window with my drink but what had happened?????????

Where was my perfect drink???

I looked at her with obvious surprise- she could see it in my eyes….as if she had killed my only beloved son and I was staring at her with shock, anger and a ton of other emotions…

….this drink looked right but she had removed that glorious domed lid and replaced it with a flat lid, she had smashed the whipped cream and chocolate drizzle down as far as she could…for no reason…it had been perfect…and then I heard what she was saying…

“the Iced Moca doesn’t come with whipped cream or chocolate…so it’s your lucky day.”

I sat there for a few moments….contemplating life and death, thinking of ways to end my life right there…in front of this women- she deserved to see my death, she was the one responsible for it, after all.

I didn’t know what to say or do….even if she was right (which she wasn’t), why wouldn’t you have just left the dome lid on it instead of making a huge mess by smashing it down with a flat lit.

As I drove off, I put the straw in the lid and it instantly erupted, like a volcano of white lava- spewing out of the top of my straw all over me….like my hopes and dreams.

The irony of all of this is that we watched “The Founder” just the other night, it’s basically the story of McDonald’s and how they didn’t want it to become a shitty restaurant like all the others….like it has become today.

Iced Mocha seems like such a simple concept and maybe, JUST MAYBE…one day I’ll have it…but until then, my journey continues…certainly full of future heart ache and sorrow.

So…to my readers…don’t be like me- use me as an example to never put your hopes into a McDonalds…because they are all just so damn terrible.

And just as proof to show that I’m write, here is a screen shot from the actual McDonald’s page….whipped cream, chocolate drizzle and a DOMED lid….if only everything on the internet was reality…if only jpeg’s we found showed real life…how amazing would that be….what a wonderful world it would be….

Love, Peace and Sharkyness